Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
