No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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