that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
