The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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