North Korea, Best Korea!
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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