Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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