I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
