there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Randomize
