i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize