3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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