that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
He shit in the fireplace
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
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