New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize
