I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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