he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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