So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
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