can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize