I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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