Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
