to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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