I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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