Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
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