they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
