can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Randomize
