We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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