They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize
