Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
