yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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