cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
