I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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