yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Randomize
