I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Randomize
