He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
Randomize
