We named our party play list daddy issues
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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