you win again, gameday.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
