New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Randomize
