Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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