He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
