plz talk dirty to me
I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
