come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
