you guys were way drunker than both of me
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
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