My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
