Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
my being single is dangerous.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize