it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
