her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
