Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Help. Why am I so naked?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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