Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
