Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
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