O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
