I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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