I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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