I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Randomize
