GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Randomize